FEAR is Forgetting Everything is All Right

Bill’s tip for April: F.E.A.R. Not

41Last month’s disaster in Japan is hard to address and even harder to grasp -the massive wall of swiftly moving debris effortlessly annihilating people, places and animals.

As real-time witnesses to Nature’s upper hand, our hearts go out to the victims and our horrors are realized: We are truly helpless in these crushing circumstances.
Fear
This stated, survival instinct and intellect are woven within us. Even in our darkest hours, our strength becomes apparent as we collectively clean up and care for others. In this process of giving we guarantee Humanity’s survival. Working together, we rebuild, reclaim and recover.

At The Mental Gym, I often find myself as a rescue-worker of sorts hired to clean up people’s emotionally-generated tsunamis. I have a strong belief that if we melted our unhealthy thoughts together, we would witness one massive, ugly lump much like the horror of February. These self-created and self-destructive stories disrupt clients’ lives and keep them struggling and running for cover.

But, unlike the naturally-created devastation in Japan, we can avert our emotional disasters by realizing and putting into practice one simple concept:

“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.”

This famous statement, proclaimed during America’s debilitating economy and catastrophic drought of the 1930’s, clarifies humanity’s overriding issue and crystallizes the key to its true salvation.

Fear is the basis of war, plight and poverty. It is our attachment to fear that creates hoarding, dishonesty and heartache. All of us can list in our own lives experiences that illustrate this sad truth. We are our own (and others) worst enemies when we buy into fear; Forgetting Everything is All Right.

Please consider adopting the belief that everything is as it should be, because to feel otherwise is to struggle senselessly. Reject a life filled with psychological impoverishment and consciously work to set yourself free regardless of your circumstance.

The less we struggle, the more energy we have to spend on worthier causes. We cannot always control our surroundings. However, we have a choice with what we do with this elemental understanding.

Phillip’s tip for April: The “F Word”

I am not referring to an expletive often heard in traffic but, rather, to the F-Bomb:

FAILURE

In our “success at all costs” culture, failure is scary. Some go to great lengths (lie, cheat, steal) to insure success -or at least the illusion of success. However, at times, despite all our best efforts, we all fail. It is how we process this reality that truly makes for a successful outcome -particularly when it feels like the world is judging or (even worse) we are self-condemning.

“No wins” can be heartbreaking -particularly when the goal has been long-term and full of hard work. We must allow ourselves to feel what we feel. Emotion often propels us to seek support, move forward and begin the process of overcoming. The event of failure can be a time for tremendous growth. As we struggle to put back the pieces, we should consider studying our unsuccessful goal and ask:

According to my values and highest sense-of-self was the goal worth pursuing?

Be realistic and try not to play the comparison game: You are where you are supposed to be and there are plenty of opportunities for corrective action if you are willing take the time to review where mistakes were made.

Love yourself and others, work smart and continue to reinvent your path and, at the end of the day, consider finding your sense of self-worth in the “being” not the “doing.”

We are all wonderful and beautiful…and flawed. Make all three successfully work for you.

Wishing you all the hope that spring and a time of renewal can bring!

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