What babies teach us about ourselves

Bill’s Tip: Steer clear of your inner-child

79Did you catch Sunday’s “The Baby Lab” segment on CBS’ 60-Minutes?

Yale researchers are investigating the very origins of humanity and morality by testing babies as young as six-months and then tracking children as they grow.

The good news is that the study’s findings point to a general inborn goodness within us: Even before we can speak or walk we can spot what’s kind and gravitate toward it – but there’s a caveat.

If we identify with someone, we tend to align with him or her
– even if they are acting immorally.

In the study, babies reached out for the puppets that shared their snack preferences even if these babies witnessed the puppet acting villainously toward other puppets.

However, as we mature, society seems to teach us to overcome our biases: By pre-pubescence, study subjects were sharing fairly and abiding by an ethical code of conduct – most of the time….

So what can we learn from all of this studying?

It is reasonable to conclude that the root of inhumanity is our tendency to regress when things aren’t going our way. Like babies, we fall back into “us versus them” mentalities when we are feeling insecure. We staunchly align with what defines us and those like us at these regressive times: We close our minds to differences in opinion, lifestyle, race, religion and economic standing – our emotional and spiritual growth seizes once our allegiances trump our allowances. We karmically reset, and must learn the cycle all over again – until we mature past this vicious cycle.

Realize the guy honking at you in the intersection is at-that-moment a terrified child – hands on the wheel, steering his life in an erratic manner because you are not acting as he would – angry because you are not like him….

This month, keep an eye on your inner-child. Look before you leap: Pause before regressing into intolerance. Remember the proven inborn goodness that exists within you and gravitate toward this state.

You’ve made it to adulthood, enjoy the peace of mind that comes from a mature perspective.

Fernanda’s Tip: Journeying to and through parenthood

120Many parents enjoy a linear pregnancy experience: healthy conception => healthy pregnancy => healthy delivery. Unfortunately, many others encounter complexities arising from a multitude of multi-directional early parenthood paths. Whether it be alternative conception methods (in vitro, surrogacy, egg donors or adoption), premature birth, serious illness, pregnancy loss or infant loss …the parental road less travelled can be challenging alone.

As I embark to help steer and establish the Ascot Angel program, I base my pursuit on knowledge learned from working for an organization that supports Cedars Sinai hospital ‘s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit and advocates for the families whose babies are hospitalized there. Each and every experience has been exceptional; each reaction unique; each client distinctive.

We believe that every person touched by these experiences whether it is a mother, father, sibling or family member, can greatly benefit by counseling and support to move through and on to a higher realm of parent life for the benefit of themselves and the children in their lives.

Like a good and seasoned coach, the Ascot Angel program will be there to guide, empower and support people throughout their journeys to and through parenthood.

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