How to Work With, Not Against, Stress

Stress for Success For years, health care professionals (including many therapists) have advised their patients to live as stress-free as possible. They've cautioned: "Stress kills." Recent findings, however, indicate stress is not the lethal culprit we once thought it to be....

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Pandemic Panic – Stopping It in Its Tracks: A Psychotherapist’s Approach

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Psychology Blog: How to be Intentionally Kind

Thanks. Giving. There’s now a company that can input your age, gender, and health specifics and then accurately predicts your longevity. The data is programmed into a smartwatch to assist you in counting down the years, weeks, and days until...

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The Power-lines of Better Communication

Have you ever noticed how people treat each other differently during emergencies: how we pull together when chaos looms? It’s as if we suddenly give ourselves permission to abide by a more humanitarian set of rules that creates better communication and gets...

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Psychology Blog: Individuality the Marie Kondo Way

I enjoy Netflix's Tidying Up with Marie Kondo. I love how keeping a household item is determined on this show by the "joy" it currently sparks in its owner. I also appreciate Marie's insistence that dishes, dresses, and dungarees...

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Sensibility: Freedom Begins Within

My mother's family tree is firmly rooted in Alabama's red-clay landscape. Because of her upbringing, my formative years were similarly grounded in a deeply Southern sensibility - a perception many experienced for the first time while paging through To Kill a...

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Fearless: Branching out without Going out on a Limb

There’s a squirrel that makes regular visits to our property. Betty, our terrier-mix, always senses the squirrel's presence. She is fearless, excitedly jumping at the glass slider to be let out into the backyard so that she can join...

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Psychology Blog: The Facets of Self-Love

One of the most significant things a person can do in life is to shower themselves with nonjudgmental and unconditional self-love. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done as many people struggle with this notion. So, why is it so easy to...

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Psychology Blog: Pleasure vs. Enjoyment

You may be aware that I co-host the weekly podcast Unsung Leaders. What you may not realize is that I am also an avid listener, as podcasts present wonderful opportunities to hear and absorb wide-ranging perspectives. I recently revisited...

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Psychology Blog: Cognitive Communication Hacks to Increase Relationship Closeness

Immersed and over-stimulated in our hustle-bustle world, it's no wonder straightforward, meaningful, and productive communication is nearly impossible to pull off! With so much to navigate, pausing long enough to actually consider another person's reactions to the way we are...

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Manage Distraction by Awakening to Life’s Moments

We’ve all sped past intended freeway exits out of distraction. We’ve also missed whole paragraphs in articles like this one due to daydreaming (another form of distraction). Focus can be challenging for all of us: for me quieting my...

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Hunting for a Happier Holiday Through Acceptance

It’s holiday Open Season! All grown up and no longer toeing-the-line of our parent’s agendas, obligations, and expectations, we have the locked-and-loaded license to see-who-we-wish and do-what-we-like. Sure, Hallmark-tinged moments remain desirous, but we now have free-reign to rein-them-in or...

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Surviving Holiday Stress and Blues

It’s that time of year again: December calendars filled with social events requiring you to engage with those exploding with holiday cheer. Like ornaments on a tree, you are expected have a bright and shiny appearance­­­­. Sounds easy enough...

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Intuition – The Healthy Brew Within You

We’ve all experienced Dèjàvu: Those oddly-familiar moments that feel chillingly unexplainable - the seemingly twisted-together tapestry of intuition and circumstance that jolts us into awareness (I feel like I’ve been here before) and questioning (Am I brushing against another...

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Brotherly Love: Grieving Through the Loss of a Pet

The air circulating through my lungs feels different–if not colder than normal. I focus on my shallow breath, the only sound in the room. The natural light coming in through the bedroom window appears changed as well–dimmer even. Through my...

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Humans Are like Diamonds: Flaws and All

Have you ever heard someone say, “I am in search of a perfectly flawed diamond?” For centuries, the diamond has been a symbol of stature, elegance, and of course love. The size of a diamond is an indicator of how valuable...

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Awareness: Using your Senses not your Stories

I avidly observe dogs because they are present-tense creatures. I find their instinctual logic both useful and inspirational for my own sense of awareness. Sure, dogs occasionally bark, cower or growl but these are behaviors bourne out of real-time...

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Keeping Relationships On-track by Paying Attention

Have you ever looked through a window only to be distracted by your reflection? Instead of intending your gaze on what’s going on past the pane of glass, suddenly you find yourself paying attention to your hair or fussing...

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Beat the Heat: Effective Tips for Avoiding Anger

Summer is in full swing: We are out-and-about, going places. We are doing things and “mixing it up” with friends, family, and absolute strangers. Maintaining cooperative spirits while juggling vocations and vacations can be challenging. Navigating summer’s crowded sidewalks...

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Getting past Cold Feet to Say, “I DO”

Oh, Weddings! Many dream for years of nuptial perfection while others take “the right person at the right time” pragmatic approach. To some, marriage feels like the appropriate next step in relationship development, while others seem to forego the...

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Success means knowing the difference between who we are and what we do

On most mornings, thoughts of work, errands, and chores stir me awake: To Do lists snap me from my slumber and toward a full day's worth of duties and tasks. My mind "goes there" out of habit and a...

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Can I Trust You with Your Own Opinion?

It's a matter of trust: All of us, at some point, have 1). adopted popular trends 2). joined the opinion bandwagon 3). mimicked the behavior of someone we perceived as better than us as a way to feel "cool." Usually,...

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Team-building Toward Win-Win Relationships

As a child, my mother taught me that successful relationships were more a result of character than content. I still pass two of her favorite sayings: “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it” and “You catch...

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Why You May Be Falling Behind Rather Than Springing Forward

The New Year is in full swing as spring is on the horizon. A few months back, many of us took to the tradition of challenging ourselves by setting goals for 2018. Whether those resolutions pertained to personal, professional,...

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Companionship Managed to Vibrant Results

The Purple Heart is a medal of honor bestowed upon heroic American soldiers wounded in battle. This Valentine's season, in the name of love (not war) I am respectfully borrowing this concept and applying it to our relationships. My...

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Easy Perspective Shifts to Enhance Your Life

This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast System! Perspective is everything: As a kid, the above announcement would haphazardly blare from the television: I'd cover my ears, irritated by the interruptive hole it punched in any afterschool rerun we...

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’Tis the Season to be….Anxious?

We have all heard the expression “holiday blues,” but are you familiar with the term “holiday angst?” This “most joyous” time of year can become stressful to even the calmest and most collected individuals. The anxiety-provoking expectation to have...

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Small Steps Toward Positive Change

I believe that the “do one thing differently” technique works for a variety of client concerns. In my experience, this approach has been helpful in decreasing ruminating thoughts and defeating self-talk, improving self-esteem, breaking negative habits, increasing motivation, and...

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THINK Your way to Effective Communication

It has been written: “there are no sure things in life,” however, my experiences as both a psychotherapist and career counselor have taught me one foolproof exception to this adage: Effective communication must include an awareness of self and others. Whether...

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The Facets of Self-Love

Self-love isn't Selfish One of the most significant things a person can do in life is to shower themselves with nonjudgmental and unconditional self-love. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done as many people struggle with this notion. So, why...

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Healthy Conflict Resolution

Let’s be honest: couples fight! This scenario gets a bad rep. but in reality, healthy conflict is an essential component of even the happiest and healthiest relationships. Arguments can be used as a tool to express feelings, gain insight...

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How Curiosity Keeps Us Healthy

How Curiosity Keeps Us Healthy I am excited about iPhone X. While this may sound trendy, trite, even off-putting to non-Apple pickers - Let me state the case for my curiosity... Today's hand-held devices are Smart: We are all within thumb's reach...

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Increasing Intimacy: Strengthening the Emotional Bond

Many people believe the term “intimacy” refers to engagement in sexual activity - This is inaccurate. Intimacy can best be understood as an emotional experience rather than merely a physical one. In romantic relationships, intimacy involves emotional engagement and...

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Mentors: Use Wisely

Mentors: Use Wisely Wisely seeking guidance from knowledgeable and kind mentors can build winning self-esteem and predicate impactful careers. I've had the privilege of interacting with a range of noteworthy individuals during my life and career: Mentors whose contributions have helped shape me...

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The 5 Love Languages and Their Influence on How We Understand Our Partner’s Emotional Needs

Have you ever felt that you and your partner express and receive love in completely different ways? Do you ever find yourself not knowing how to meet his/her emotional needs? If so, you most likely speak different love languages. Love...

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Couples Therapy as a Tool Rather Than a Means to an End

Tending to the state of your relationship is similar to maintaining your body at the gym. The more out of shape your body becomes, the harder it is to sustain good health. Well, the same goes for romantic relationships! The more distance...

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Gay Parenting and Therapy: A Perfect Match

With the Supreme Court's 2015 ruling to legalize gay marriage and 2016 ruling to permit same-sex adoption throughout the United States came a progressive step toward the acceptance of gay parenting, right?? The number of same-sex couples who are raising children in the...

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21 Relationship Counseling Jackpots:

We all run across relationship counseling advice (this article is an example). We reflexively flag these emails or dump them into our computer's Trash folders. My mother is my Santa Claus in this regard: I've even devoted a whole...

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Mothering and Parenting – An Updated Understanding

Mothering and Parenting - An Updated Understanding What is Mothering, anyway? Mothers come with different designations: There are birth mothers, adopted mothers, and mothers you choose (like a favorite older friend or mentor). The act of mothering also means a variety of behaviors: Helper, spiritual...

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Passing the Time Away…

Here we go, yet ANOTHER quarantine article!? Well, what else are we supposed to write about, read about, talk about, think about these days? After all, I wouldn’t want to appear “out of the loop!” I do not typically...

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Creating New Year’s Resolutions That Work For All Of Us

It's not only a New Year but a New Decade: Even-more reason to be out with the old and in with the new- New Year’s Resolutions are part of this hoopla - and can be effective mapping strategies for inspiring...

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Dealing with Disappointment

Thinking back to your childhood, would you have considered yourself a good sport or a poor sport? Did you throw the baseball glove on the ground when you missed the fly ball or refuse to high-five the winning team...

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Psychology Blog: The Five Love Languages

Have you ever felt that you and your partner express and receive love in entirely different ways? Do you ever find yourself not knowing how to meet their emotional needs? If so, you most likely speak different love languages. Love Language...

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