Telling the Truth About Lying

As lying becomes commonplace in Social Media, a clear conversation is needed about how lying affects our emotional wellbeing. Bending experiences into Instagrammed smiles or exaggerated Facebook passages, many skew personal data. As a result, we’ve become a culture of false perception versus authenticity.

“A Little White Lie Never Hurt Anyone.”

Is sugarcoating reality merely a naughty/tasty flavor-variation of 21st-century communication or are we dulling our sensibilities? Could we be missing opportunities to learn from our missteps because we refuse to admit we make mistakes? I fear we are dimming enlightenment and emotionally stumbling as a result of our collective campaigns to appear perfect.

Here’s why: As social beings, we are designed to learn-and-grow through interaction. Truthful representation earns trust, whereas fibs and fables spin a web of misdirection based in our need to posture or prove. What is our destination if we cannot have an honest journey and where does this lying leave us?

Lying is a personal declaration that your truth isn’t good enough.

Lying comes from a kind of low self-esteem that chokes out any potential for us to learn and grow. Caught lying is humiliating but it pales in comparison to the damage that occurs when we hold onto accolades perpetuated by falsehoods. As a result, lying makes us imposters in our own lives and diminishes our abilities to genuinely learn from the free tutoring life has to offer.

Control Is Our Tormenter: Acceptance Is Our Teacher.

Our hard-headed behavior isn’t new. Sigmund Freud coined Repetition Compulsion to describe the obsession for controlling circumstances and repeating even unhealthy behaviors. Change only occurs when we become emotionally battered enough to try something outside the realm of these self-involved actions.

When we are concerned with our surroundings, we seek to control. Yet, as truly containing anything that doesn’t originate within us is unlikely, this need creates an incurable paradox: The beginning point of healing comes through acceptance – not “expectance.”

“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.”

– Winston Churchill

Acceptance is not an admission of defeat, rather, it is a mindset of setting down struggle and focusing, instead, on learning from what is occurring. Contemplating the cause and effect of our actions is invaluable to our emotional growth. Utilized correctly, the trial and error characteristic of this practice allows us to fine-tune our calculations and develop into stronger and more accomplished individuals.

“To Thine Own Self Be True”

We, alone, navigate the course of our actions: Between stimulus and response is a moment wherein lies our freedom to choose. The choice affects the outcome: We can function authentically or act to perpetuate the madness. I believe it is always better to show up to any circumstance with a kind heart, an open mind, and a willingness to learn something.